A Culture Shock Christmas

December always feels like a surprise – bam, it’s already here! And so I lurch to the end of the year, maneuvering all the year-end deadlines, while also trying to make room for the holidays. Happy Holidays indeed! Whoever came up with fiscal calendar years must have been a Scrooge.

It takes a whole lot of organizing to get gifts and cards in place, if you want to do it right. Those of you who do have my utmost respect and admiration. Much of my holiday shopping gets crammed into an afterthought, and my holiday greetings are always delayed. They are at most new year’s greetings in the sense that you will hear from me somewhere in the new year, possibly well after the New Year … if I manage to get to them at all.

If that is how it feels now, how did it feel to Sayyida Salme, newly christened Emily Ruete, when she arrived in Hamburg in 1867? We are so deep in our holiday routines and rituals – red and green as far as the eye can see – that it is all the more interesting to consider her very first Christmas, ever. Her Letters to the Homeland gives a vivid description:

The way people rushed about on the streets with their countless packages, the closer Christmas came, made such an impression on me that I pestered my husband with questions. For one, it was completely new to me that people would ask each other what gifts they wanted. As an example: “Friedrich, my son, what would you like for Christmas?” or also “Dear Anna, is there anything I can give you as a present?” and more of the same. I was therefore quite surprised when my husband asked me one day what I might in fact desire and what I most wanted to have. Of course, I had absolutely no specific wishes, since I had everything I might need. (Letters, p. 33)

What a quaint thought – that we might have everything we need. She continues:

We now often went into town to make purchases for my husband’s relatives and our servants. In general, I really enjoyed the way everyone, from the highest to the lowest, could make their own purchases. This struck me as much better and more comfortable than our way of doing it, which makes us so dependent on the taste and intelligence of our slaves. (Letters, p. 33)

If you have been following my blog, you surely just had a flash of recognition on the subject of evolving consumer choice in the West [1] ….

On our drive, we passed one of the busiest streets in the city, with people whose rushed pace could hardly be described as walking. The whole world seemed to be in such an inexplicable hurry. I will never forget the scene of a man, tightly gripping a pendulum clock with both arms, who rushed along with such speed that everyone scurried out of his way. (Letters, p. 35)  

As to the actual celebration on the eve of the 24^th, when Germans get their gifts (no need to wait until the 25^th, especially because Sankt Nikolaus already came on the 6^th), she says:

On Christmas Eve, after our servants had gotten their presents, we drove off in a carriage to my husband’s parents with their presents, to spend the evening there. It was my first Christmas celebration ever, and to this point, I had absolutely no idea how Christians celebrate their festivals. I was acutely interested in finding out what this Occidental ritual was like. I had seen pictures in the church, but without knowing their meaning and purpose, and not having wanted to ask my husband about them—on the one hand, out of consideration for his feelings toward his religion (for what did I know back then of the countless ways to profess one’s Christianity?), and on the other hand—and that was the main thing for me—to avoid discovering that the Christian religion was in fact, as some tended to believe in our parts, idol worship. Exactly that would have been contrary to my convictions. For these reasons, I steered clear of any questions pertaining to the upcoming celebration. (Letters, pp. 34-35)

And what do you think she found – idol worship or not? I won’t spoil it for you here, since she says it best herself. Her Christmas description is part and parcel of the overall culture shock and conversion challenges that fill the first third of the Letters. But knowing how we press our Western excesses, you can probably guess. Even as she tried her best to do it right:

The next morning, on the 25th of December, my husband was surprised to see me coming down the stairs from the bedroom already at ten o’ clock in my full regalia. He shouted something to me like: “My God, Bibi, what has happened, where on earth do you plan to go?” I first swooshed calmly down the stairs with my long train and then asked if he had not himself said to me that today and tomorrow were holidays. “As you see, that is why I got so dressed up.” “Yes, Bibi, that is customary for you, but not here with us.” Strange people, these Northerners, I thought to myself, and went back upstairs to change into my normal clothing. (Letters, p. 36)

To which I can only say, however you celebrate this time of year, happy holidays to you, too!

Let history surprise you, let her story inspire you – let her authentic voice speak to you.

Andrea Emily Stumpf, December 17, 2025

Photo credit: Combination of an item from Pinterest Antonella Girani, Albero di natale fai da te, and the Woodland Angel card from RebaRose Creations

[1] From two blog posts ago: How to Choose?? Die Qual der Wahl.